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View Full Version : How to make YOUR jewish name!


Przemysław
02-19-2007, 06:26 AM
This evolved in the chatbox this evening.

Instructions on making a jewish name:

1. Take any German word, or any prefix to any name. For example, we'll make use of Ixabert's. We must divide it in half.
I.E.: Ixabert=Ixa

2. Add the suffix "-stein," "-berg," or "-witz."

3. Combing the two to make your jewish name!

In which case we have:

Ixaberg


:D

sugartits
02-19-2007, 06:37 AM
"Your Jewish name is: sugarwitz"

Omniel
02-19-2007, 06:58 AM
So what you're saying is that a lot of Jews have German sounding names ending in -berg, -stein and -witz? Wow, that's inspired!

Starr
02-19-2007, 07:05 AM
Glenn Miller gave me my name a few months ago:

http://www.vnnforum.com/showpost.php?p=425744&postcount=6

sugartits
02-19-2007, 07:14 AM
This is not exciting.

antibuddha
02-19-2007, 07:28 AM
'antistein'

I guess this makes me anti-semitic now.

Zubenelgenubi
02-19-2007, 07:36 AM
leopoldstein?

nah, I already have a jewish name, and it doesn't end in -stein, -witz, OR -berg.

sugartits
02-19-2007, 07:56 AM
leopoldstein?


Bloomberg. It works.

Zubenelgenubi
02-19-2007, 08:02 AM
Bloomberg. It works.
I suppose that's true. But that would get confusing, as there exists the danger of being confused with the mayor of New York.

Anyway, Leopold Bloom is already the name of a Jew.

sugartits
02-19-2007, 08:08 AM
Mein Gotstein, it's raining businessmen.

Micaelis
02-19-2007, 08:14 AM
Mein Gotstein, it's raining businessmen.

Are you on meth?

Zubenelgenubi
02-19-2007, 08:23 AM
Mein Gotstein, it's raining businessmen.
I've always wondered how they manage to keep their hats on.

Dodge Viper
02-19-2007, 08:25 AM
Nickwitz; maybe Nickawitz is better

sugartits
02-19-2007, 08:30 AM
Are you on meth?

Me, no. But you must be too mucked out of your gulliver to notice that in bloom's avatar it is pouring suits.

sugartits
02-19-2007, 08:35 AM
I've always wondered how they manage to keep their hats on.

the hats are possibly made of lead, or something else quite heavy. it may be what pushes them down from the sky.

Przemysław
02-19-2007, 08:46 AM
Hail Marywitz, full of grace
The Lordstein is with thee...

OMG Jews are taking over Catholicism!

Ahknaton
02-19-2007, 08:57 AM
If neo-nazis were Jews they'd be neo-nazim.

Ahknaton
02-19-2007, 08:57 AM
I've always wondered how they manage to keep their hats on.
It's an optical illusion, they're actually flying upwards. They're being raptured into Heaven at the end of the tax year.

The Retard
02-19-2007, 08:58 AM
Theberg? Thewitz? Thestein? Oh crap, my name don't work!

Kriger
02-19-2007, 10:06 AM
Bamse Skjorta von Krigerschtein.



:viking:

Heavens to Betsy
02-19-2007, 10:35 AM
Heavens to Betsyberg.

Or perhaps Heavens to Betsiberg :D

WFHermans
02-19-2007, 10:46 AM
Retardwitz.

tempus fugit
02-19-2007, 12:34 PM
Hawkikewitz.

Ahknaton
02-19-2007, 01:37 PM
This thread is Retardwitzed.

Lieutenant William Bligh
02-19-2007, 04:52 PM
This evolved in the chatbox this evening.

Instructions on making a jewish name:

1. Take any German word, or any prefix to any name. For example, we'll make use of Ixabert's. We must divide it in half.
I.E.: Ixabert=Ixa

2. Add the suffix "-stein," "-berg," or "-witz."

3. Combing the two to make your jewish name!

In which case we have:

Ixaberg


:D

You should make this more interesting. Like a program, that outputs absurdly arranged Jewish names. Like your Hobbit name, your Viking name or your Elf name.

Nyx
02-19-2007, 05:28 PM
This is an attack on my character.

Winston
02-19-2007, 05:32 PM
Relax, Galtonbaum.

Omniel
02-19-2007, 08:45 PM
That's one of the shittest threads ever.

Przemysław
02-19-2007, 09:12 PM
I didn't mean for you guys to take it literally but...

Too late.

VAMPIR
02-19-2007, 10:21 PM
Cernoberg or Cernobogstein?

Omniel
02-19-2007, 10:27 PM
Cernoberg or Cernobogstein?
Or even....Cernobogwitz? Or Cernobogberg!1!1!!!1

The humour is endless.

Ahknaton
02-19-2007, 10:57 PM
I didn't mean for you guys to take it literally but...

Too late.
Really? What's the metaphorical meanng of "How to make YOUR jewish name!"?

il ragno
02-19-2007, 11:20 PM
Todd Singletonwitz.

Nahh, too unwieldly.

Keystone
02-19-2007, 11:26 PM
Keystein
Kikestone
Kikestein
Yidstone

Thomas777
02-19-2007, 11:27 PM
I feel bad for the guys named "Rosenberg"...that name can either connote an uber-Aryan Nazi sympathizer or a Jewish orthodontist.

Be that as it may, my Jew-dar is absolutely impeccable and I never need to fall back on surname analysis.

Also:

This is the worst thread ever.

Ahknaton
02-19-2007, 11:48 PM
Keystein
Kikestone
Kikestein
Yidstone
Keister perhaps?

Keystone
02-19-2007, 11:51 PM
Keister perhaps?
Nope.
The other names were given to me by the gents at VNN...:rofl:

Omniel
02-19-2007, 11:59 PM
Lackofwitz.

Ahknaton
02-20-2007, 12:21 AM
Phora Phuckwitz.

Przemysław
02-20-2007, 04:10 AM
Really? What's the metaphorical meanng of "How to make YOUR jewish name!"?
There is no metaphorical meaning.

It's more a stab at ironicberg/sarcasticalwitz humorstein.

Lieutenant William Bligh
02-20-2007, 05:31 AM
Lackofwitz.

That's a good one. :rofl:

Horrorwitz

Upmystein

Forza Azzurri
02-20-2007, 05:36 AM
alvstein:whip:

Dr. Gutberlet
02-20-2007, 05:49 AM
"berg" simply means "mountain", and is not Jewish. Peter Forsberg is not a Jew. Pelle Lindberg is not a Jew. Johann Hedberg is not a Jew. I could go on many, many more times. Anyhow, I am Dr. Gutberstein.

Helios Panoptes
02-20-2007, 05:55 AM
This thread would shame Apologist.

Rakhmetov
02-22-2007, 04:02 AM
Add the suffix "-stein," "-berg," or "-witz."

-berg which means mountain is a common suffix in Germanic names. Alfred Rosenberg was a prominent Nazi leader. Roman Ungern von Sternberg was a psychotic counterrevolutionary Russian general in Mongolia. Per Westerberg is a Swedish politician.

-stein which means stone is common in German names like Steinbach.

-witz which seems to be a distorted spelling of Polish -wicz is equivalent to Russian vitsch meaning "son". Examples include Polish prime minister Jozef Cyrankiewicz and Croat quisling fascist Ante Pavelić

Incitatus
02-22-2007, 11:37 AM
Incitawitz? *shivers*

Kriger
02-22-2007, 12:20 PM
Incitawitz? *shivers*

Just what are you thinking about inciting the witz to do?