The Retard
01-21-2006, 08:00 PM
Parents should act, not freak out (http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2006/01/21/BAGKHGR1D71.DTL)
The television trucks were lined up four deep at Foothill High School on Wednesday night for the announcement that the school is banning sexually suggestive "freak dancing." And no wonder. It was a story made for headlines: "School Forbids Sex-Crazed Dancing."
That it was happening in upscale and suburban Pleasanton was almost too perfect. The story had it all: Out-of-control teens, shocked parents, stern school administrators, racy bumping and grinding to an MTV soundtrack. This wasn't a news story, it was a remake of the movie "Footloose."
But somewhere in the midst of it all, behind the TV cameras looming before Principal Kevin Johnson and the pen-and-notebook types like me buttonholing students and parents, there was a bigger story here. Not as racy as simulated sex on the dance floor, but something of interest just the same.
For all the attention, all the lights and cameras, there wasn't much of a turnout. In all there were probably 50 parents. Granted, some were probably stuck in traffic. But was this really an issue that struck to the core of the educational system?
If so, where was everyone? And how could they miss the obvious solution to the "problem."
Not that the passion shown by those who did attend wasn't real. Corine Fanene, the single parent who accidentally set off the whole fuss, says she was shocked by the behavior she witnessed at a Dec. 16 school dance. Girls, she said, were rubbing the backs of their skimpy dresses into the crotches of the boys they were dancing with.
"It almost looked like an orgy," she says. "Really."
Fanene complained to school administrators and felt she got a tepid response. She tells us that one school official told her the dance "was a success." Fanene then wrote an e-mail describing the dancing -- think lap dances -- to several parents. The e-mail took on a life of its own as it was forwarded all over the district, posted on Myspace.com and, finally, printed out and distributed at the school.
Soon afterward, Johnson and his staff decided to ban freak dancing, announcing that "freakers" would be kicked out of the dance and barred from subsequent dances. Their hope was to set a standard not only for Foothill, but also for schools nationwide struggling with the issue in recent years. Freaking is nothing new, and schools in Palo Alto and other cities across the country already have banned it.
"Is a dance that simulates sexual activity appropriate for a public high school?" asked Vice Principal Matt Campbell. "We say no."
All of which sounded pretty reasonable until those darn students got up and started making some pretty good points.
Too bad so few parents were there to hear them.
"What about the salsa or the tango?" asked senior Leah Kendall. "Those were sexually driven. I was disgusted by some of the dancing as well, but we are not all like that."
Student Body President Elizabeth Usedom, whom Campbell singled out as an influential and respected voice on campus, was among those who insisted freak dancing can be as harmless as the old, lights-out slow dances. (Of course, way back in my parents' day, teachers used run around the dance floor with a ruler, making sure we slow dancers were at least 12 inches apart.)
"I personally don't think freak dancing should be banned," said Usedom. "It is a very small group of people who like to cross the line. I think it can be done appropriately."
Can it? Would I want my daughter "freaking?" To be honest, no. But neither am I thrilled with the fact she has a belly button piercing. However, after lots of discussion, we've decided a belly button jewel is not the end of civilization. So I'd be willing to listen to arguments for freak dancing.
Frankly, most adults at the meeting admitted they know as much about freak dancing as they do the new Nickelback tune. Campbell said he looked it up on www.urbandictionary.com and Googled it before the meeting.
Most of us over 25 have a general idea what it is, but we don't get the nuances.
"A big part of it is where your hands are," said Usedom, who says she has "freaked." "And both feet should be on the ground. The girl should be standing upright, and so should the boy."
So -- what is behavior that crosses the line? Who can say? As sophomore Mohini Kundu, a reporter for the school paper said, "The whole policy can't be found until you find that line. So far we've had two meetings, and what have we done except complain?"
Fanene, meanwhile, is caught in the middle of a controversy she didn't mean to start. Some people are calling her a nosy prude. Do you know what she really was?
She was the only parent in a school with more than 2,000 students who was willing to be a chaperone at the Dec. 16 dance.
In the days after Wednesday night's much-publicized meeting, the phones at Foothill rang off the hook. Everyone had an opinion. Too bad none of those callers had attended the dance to see things for themselves, or step in if they thought things were getting too racy.
The answer to this controversy is pretty simple. If you really are concerned about freak dancing and what kids are doing when the lights go down, step up and get involved. Foothill -- like most other schools -- is begging for adult chaperones.
The television trucks were lined up four deep at Foothill High School on Wednesday night for the announcement that the school is banning sexually suggestive "freak dancing." And no wonder. It was a story made for headlines: "School Forbids Sex-Crazed Dancing."
That it was happening in upscale and suburban Pleasanton was almost too perfect. The story had it all: Out-of-control teens, shocked parents, stern school administrators, racy bumping and grinding to an MTV soundtrack. This wasn't a news story, it was a remake of the movie "Footloose."
But somewhere in the midst of it all, behind the TV cameras looming before Principal Kevin Johnson and the pen-and-notebook types like me buttonholing students and parents, there was a bigger story here. Not as racy as simulated sex on the dance floor, but something of interest just the same.
For all the attention, all the lights and cameras, there wasn't much of a turnout. In all there were probably 50 parents. Granted, some were probably stuck in traffic. But was this really an issue that struck to the core of the educational system?
If so, where was everyone? And how could they miss the obvious solution to the "problem."
Not that the passion shown by those who did attend wasn't real. Corine Fanene, the single parent who accidentally set off the whole fuss, says she was shocked by the behavior she witnessed at a Dec. 16 school dance. Girls, she said, were rubbing the backs of their skimpy dresses into the crotches of the boys they were dancing with.
"It almost looked like an orgy," she says. "Really."
Fanene complained to school administrators and felt she got a tepid response. She tells us that one school official told her the dance "was a success." Fanene then wrote an e-mail describing the dancing -- think lap dances -- to several parents. The e-mail took on a life of its own as it was forwarded all over the district, posted on Myspace.com and, finally, printed out and distributed at the school.
Soon afterward, Johnson and his staff decided to ban freak dancing, announcing that "freakers" would be kicked out of the dance and barred from subsequent dances. Their hope was to set a standard not only for Foothill, but also for schools nationwide struggling with the issue in recent years. Freaking is nothing new, and schools in Palo Alto and other cities across the country already have banned it.
"Is a dance that simulates sexual activity appropriate for a public high school?" asked Vice Principal Matt Campbell. "We say no."
All of which sounded pretty reasonable until those darn students got up and started making some pretty good points.
Too bad so few parents were there to hear them.
"What about the salsa or the tango?" asked senior Leah Kendall. "Those were sexually driven. I was disgusted by some of the dancing as well, but we are not all like that."
Student Body President Elizabeth Usedom, whom Campbell singled out as an influential and respected voice on campus, was among those who insisted freak dancing can be as harmless as the old, lights-out slow dances. (Of course, way back in my parents' day, teachers used run around the dance floor with a ruler, making sure we slow dancers were at least 12 inches apart.)
"I personally don't think freak dancing should be banned," said Usedom. "It is a very small group of people who like to cross the line. I think it can be done appropriately."
Can it? Would I want my daughter "freaking?" To be honest, no. But neither am I thrilled with the fact she has a belly button piercing. However, after lots of discussion, we've decided a belly button jewel is not the end of civilization. So I'd be willing to listen to arguments for freak dancing.
Frankly, most adults at the meeting admitted they know as much about freak dancing as they do the new Nickelback tune. Campbell said he looked it up on www.urbandictionary.com and Googled it before the meeting.
Most of us over 25 have a general idea what it is, but we don't get the nuances.
"A big part of it is where your hands are," said Usedom, who says she has "freaked." "And both feet should be on the ground. The girl should be standing upright, and so should the boy."
So -- what is behavior that crosses the line? Who can say? As sophomore Mohini Kundu, a reporter for the school paper said, "The whole policy can't be found until you find that line. So far we've had two meetings, and what have we done except complain?"
Fanene, meanwhile, is caught in the middle of a controversy she didn't mean to start. Some people are calling her a nosy prude. Do you know what she really was?
She was the only parent in a school with more than 2,000 students who was willing to be a chaperone at the Dec. 16 dance.
In the days after Wednesday night's much-publicized meeting, the phones at Foothill rang off the hook. Everyone had an opinion. Too bad none of those callers had attended the dance to see things for themselves, or step in if they thought things were getting too racy.
The answer to this controversy is pretty simple. If you really are concerned about freak dancing and what kids are doing when the lights go down, step up and get involved. Foothill -- like most other schools -- is begging for adult chaperones.